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Trog's Tavern XCII

Upon entering the tavern you find it to be rustic, dim, cramped, and smelling of spilled beer. Moving through the crowd, half of which seem to be deadtiming, you spot a fireplace with a banjowood carving on the mantle, you also make out through the haze the curving bar and private booths hidden behind ferns. A side door leading to a bamboo patio outside reveals a hungry looking dumpster mimic sneaking towards an unsuspecting customer.

On the wall is a large, ornate mirror which people seem to step in and out of freely. A winding staircase near the front door leads to rooms for rent upstairs. The backroom is now completely off-limits to all patrons and most of the bar staff, the owner likes her privacy.

Trog's Tavern is no longer enchanted to be indestructible. Attempting to damage it will succeed. Now with Free Sweet, Delicious Wi-Fi.

New: Anyone that is not a bar staff that tries to pilfer drinks out of where they are kept will get a maximised disintegrate to the head. You have been warned.

In Memoriam (hall of former staff): Trog (owner emeritus), El Jaspero (manager emeritus), Hoseki (bouncer), Tempest Stormwing (bouncer), Valthreborn Valthera (bouncer), Vivian (bartender), Alex Shipmaster (bartender), Erdan (bartender), Kantur (bartender), Who (cook), Zee (cook)

Current Staff:
Owner and Proprietor: Melantha
Manager: Now hiring
Bartenders: Aurora
Bouncers: Now hiring Temp. Bouncer: Aurora
Cook: Now hiring
Entertainment: T.B.A.

NOW HIRING: Bartenders, Cooks, Talented bards, Burly bouncers, etc.
(Hey bards: just take spotlight in the tavern's center and start singing!)

Only the finest NPC servers:

Nina - A feisty and vivacious 18 year old (she's legal). Mean and completely unavailable.
Paige - A sweet and wholesome elf working her way through college here in town.
Cosmo - A quick-witted and oppressed gnome scoundrel.

All will be happy to serve you. Since all are NPCs they are up for communal control. Feel free to say what they do or say to you or any other patron. To a point.


Catoblepas Sauvingnon
Chimera Cabernet - A hearty red with a hits of oak and black cherry.
Kobold Chianti - Tart and tangy! Try it with fava beans!
Merfolk Merlot - Full-bodied with a hint of rose.
Purple Worm Pinot - Earthy aroma.
Funky Llama - A rich fruity wine, available in white or red.
Iames Agonia - This tart, dark red wine will stun you and leave you feeling good for hours.
Xorn Zinfandel - Sweet and fruity!
Cormyrian Fireamber - Imported and very good.
Spoonake Chablis - Straight from the Underdark!
Feline's Fancy - A purplish, swirly mixture that any feline will adore.

Mixed Drinks:
Pina CoLlama - If you're not into yoga and have half a brain.
Swampwater - A Phosphorescent lemon-lime delight.
Jasphattan - Sweet vermouth with bitters and more.
White Russian Wukei - Vodka, Kahlua, and Milk.
Long Island Iced Tea - Tastes better than it will make you feel in the morning.
Mai Tai - Dark and pineapple juice.
Sneak on the Beach - Vodka, Cranberry juice, pineapple juice and Peach Schapps.
Rust Monster - Scotch and Drambuie.
Coffee Martini - Buzzzzz.
Murderita - Wasted away again...
Rampaging Rail Mixer - Mad strong!
Ice Liqueur - Guaranteed to cool you down.
Dwarf Spirits
Aboleth Absinthe
LEVEL UP LIQUER - Need a few extra XP? We gots XP in a bottle!
Dragon's Liver Buster - The strongest drink in the house. Don't say we didn't warn you...
Constitution Crushing Wine - Fort. DC 35 or pass out!
Djinn and Tonic - Whirling ice cubes, fizzy soda, and one drunk genie.
Rum Llamonade Daquiri
Mudslide Daquiri
Chuul Lounge - Bacardi Limon, Aberration, creme de bananes and juices
Ichor Liquor - Made from a fermented mix of various kinds of blood
Black Market Wallbanger
Hydrogelic's 110 proof Firewater
Guild Vodka No. 3
Black Shadow - A strong concoction guaranteed to send a chill down your spine at any temperature.
Haley's Liquer - Named for the redheaded rogue, a sweet creme liquer, excellent over ice.
Wizard Blizzard - Crushed ice and Bourbon. The effect depends on the spell stored in it.
Black Ice - Named after one of the greatest rock bands, this mix of Black Shadow and Ice Liquer is guaranteed to give you a chill
Nut Brew - An herbal mixture combined with whiskey. So sweet, it's like your not even drinking!

Beers & Such:
Grim Brewery brand Ginger - Death-o-licious!
Archon Ale
Guilders Ale
Balthor's Best
Mind Flayer Mead - Mmm... brains!

Other Fine Beverages:
Celestial Soda Pop - Soda specially brewed in Celestia. Tastes divine.
Darknight Coffee - Cream has no effect.
Root Beer
Red Minotaur - Energy Drink
Llamonade - That cool, refreshing drink for quadrupeds.
Dragon's Fire Breath - Cherry Kool-Aid for the kids!
Fox Cola - The choice of the furry generation.
Hot Chocolate - With little marshmallows and stuff.

Hot Spicy Peanuts - Damned Spicy!
Velvet Elfish - Trogtilla chips with hot cheese and meat dip - soooo good.
Fortune Cookies - I got this deal with a local factory see...
Bamhacon - Where ham meets bacon.
Salads - Spring Greens, Caesar, and Italian Pasta
Who's Surprise

Dwarven Cigars - From our axe-hewn humidor
Coffin Nail™ Cigarettes - Get Nailed!
Halfling Pipeweed - Bogart™ brand

If you don't see it, ask for it!

I shake ash and dust off my hair aand I sit down across from Loki. "Come on, hun, just gotta be sneaky."

She even told 'em not to serve me anymore, Loki sniffles.  It looks like he's actually about to cry.

"She didn't tell me to not give you any." Since the NPCs had evacuated during the fire, there's 'free beer' sitting everywhere. I grab a bottle from another seating position.

It's not fair...she's just plain mean, tears actually begin welling up in his eyes.  This is definitely not normal for Loki.

I plop the beer down between us. I then open up a pouch I had with me, drawing out a oval stone. I pop it on my forehead.

"Grown ups often are." I draw the psychic energy into my third eye, allowing me to Aura-veiw.

It seems like there's a warped shield type of thing around him.  (Very hard to describe.)  Like someone else is influencing him in some way.  For all intents and purposes, he is a kid.

Loki picks up the mug and sips at it, hiccuping as children often do as they try to stop crying.

Hm... I ponder the type of person capable of doing this. Reversion, and deflection. It would be a very powerful person.

I try to focus harder on the shield, see if it's divine, psionic, or arcane.

Oh, it's definitely divine.  Something about it seems like Loki's.  Almost like an echo of it.

Loki continues to sip his beer.  Like most kids, after he's gotten what he wanted, he's rather content.

Loki's shielding himself? From what? I continued pondering this. There was something not right about the whole ordeal that didn't make sense. I continued the aura power to observe others in the tavern that would have any mystical prowess.

There's no one in there now that was capable of such tricks.  Other than Loki himself and Moxie (probably.)  Of course, the guy that walked out walked out when Moxie was unconscious...

I had to concentrate. Also, I started getting death stares from the staff. You know, the whole giving Loki what he wanted as bound to make me enemies. It would be stupid to argue with either Mel or Loki, it would be stupid to stand in the way of either one of them. I didn't have much of a choice. I tried to hide my face so they couldn't point me out later.

Due to my eccentric dress style, I'm sure that didn't work.

Oh well, at least Loki's appeased for the moment.  He's taking sips of his beer and in between sips he hums happily.

"So, Loki, how have you been doing lately?" I ask.

I'm okay now.  Thanks for the drink, he grins in a naive nature.  I've been doin' okay, too.  I'm Calliph.  People mostly do what I say.  I think Mel-mel doesn't like me in this form cuz I'm not as hot. He grins again.

"Indeed," I said, exercising the great patience that being an earth sign give, "If it's any consolation, as a fire giant, you'll always be hot." Despite the horrible pun, my smile doesn't crack and my tone doesn't change. "Hm, is it hard to revert to the 'hotter' form?"

'Hotter' like looking like my real fire giant self or 'hotter' like how I usually look?  He concentrates and looks much taller, but still young.  His hair reverts to flaims and even his eyes glow.  He grins at his accomplishment.

"Indeed," I reach over and grab another bottle off the bucket of a busboy, I hide it in my sleeve. I stare at the busboy, he takes off inflicted by fear. I knew more about him from that stare than his mother, girlfriend, and therapist combined. He had the right to be afraid.

I place this bottle onto the table between me and Loki. "Are you still feeling spite and hatred?"

Yes, Loki pouts as he returns to his more human form--still a child.

"Hm, negative energy spreads out, it harms those who like us, those who just want to help." Oh! I just realized why all the waitstaff feared me, it's because I have a lot of features similar to Rex/Regina. That would explain it! "If enough negative energy flows out, those who care about us fall into danger, most leave, and those that stay will be destroyed."

My demeanor remains unchanged, completely deadpan as always. I seem like someone could say that line laughing and smiling as if it were a joke.

But she started it, really, Loki argues.

"And she will find the same thing on her end. One must be cautious of their own actions before they can ever blame others. It's as if you're running with scissors, constantly looking back because you're afraid that someone will stab you from behind. Your distraction leads you to trip, which leads to you poking your eye out." I mime poking my eye out with my thumb. That last part was said with a smile, but no tone change, it might be meant as a joke.

"And sure, you can blame the mysterious figure that may or may not exist that caused your paranoia, but isn't that just silly?"

It's not, Loki scowls.  It's not imaginary.  She really did start it.

"She started it, yes, then you just went way out of line. Calliphs generally don't try and burn down parts of the town." Ba'al grumbles quietly and orders something to calm her down, the strongest drink Trog's has, whatever that may be.

"So?" I said to him, "I'm not talking to her. Had I been, I'd scold her for the taunt and for letting things escalate that far out of control. But, I'm talking to you, and I saw you take such taunts and let it effect you in the worst way. If you had walked away, found another bar, asked nicely, persuaded another patron such as myself to get you what you wanted, it would not have gotten that bad. Instead, you threw a fit, nearly burnt down the tavern and everyone inside."

I smile, "I'm not fireproof like you, so um... I'd like for you to not light me on fire."

I will if you keep being contrary.  I'm Calliph.  I'm in the right.  He seems to say this both to Moxie and Ba'al.

"Well if you want to stay as Calliph then you'd better damn well start acting like it anyway. Why are you acting like a child?"

I slide Loki the other beer. The trumph card to regain his favor if things went sour like this. Proving that he could be wrong will only invoke a personal response. In any way. I took note of this.

"Contrary?" I said, indignant, "Are you saying I think you're wrong? No way, you're Calliph," I'm pretty sure it was a made up word, but far be it for me to question it, "You cannot be wrong. If I upset you, it would be right for you to light me on fire." I say this with same deadpan as before, it's eerie how similar my speaking patterns are to Rex's. "My only implication is the request that you not light me on fire, as I am totally on your side."

Loki grins, his anger abated as he is placated upon receiving the new beer.  He looks at Ba'al.  I am a child.  At least in this form.  I take the mindset of whatever I turn into.  You shoulda seen me as a horse.

"I'm kind of glad I didn't. Seriously though, why are you staying as a child? The last thing we need is for this town to burn to the ground because you didn't get a lollipop!"

Loki attempts to turn back into an adult, at least, it looks like he's concentrating.  It then looks like he's panicking.  What...why...why can't I change back?!  He looks like he's going to start crying again.

"I believe someone is screwing with us." I say, turning to Ba'al, "They would have to have to be very powerful. I think he's using Loki's own magic against him." I say, when Loki is satisfying himself with the beer.

I steal another beer from a nearby table, necessary tokens in this negotiation. Sighing, I toss that bottle to Loki, and start seeking another.

"Well, that's not good."

"Not good? That's a bit of an understatement! How would you like being stuck as a kid?" Slythynia gets up and walks over to Loki, gently trying to just hold his shoulder. "Are you sure it's not something like the beer affecting your ability to concentrate?"

Loki shakes his head.  Beer doesn't affect me! I just drink it for the taste. Of course, why anyone would do that is beyond his player...

Loki begins sobbing.

Slythynia sits down in the seat next to Loki and takes off her hat. "Hey, listen, look at me. Whatever's happened, we'll sort it out, I promise you."

"As a god, he is immune to the effects of alcohol. We've been over this a thousand times. Hence I keep giving it to him. Oh, and thank you for joining the game late and screwing everything up. I've been managing to keep him calm this entire time." I scolded Slythynia, "Anyways, Loki has a weird effect flowing around him, and I just can't affect it. But it's not something he set up himself. Someone tampered with him..."

L-liar.  If I set it up I could fix it. Loki sobs into his beer.

"You are correct. If you set it up, you could fix it." I reply.

"You're complaining at the wrong person. Ba'al is the one who screwed up by trying to make him become an adult again." Slythynia frowns, concerned, and also somewhat annoyed that the blame for this was being directed at her...for some reason. "Well, if someone did this to him, when did they do it, I wonder."

It had to b-be after I w-went to my form b-by myself.  I did t-that.  I d-don't wanna stay. Like. This, the last three words are separated by particularly loud sobs.

"It's recent, I would say the person was in the room with us at the time, but he isn't here now. He must've evacuated before or during the fire." I say, "Unfortunately, I was busy during those times."

Al goes over to the sobing Loki. " Hey don't worry Calliph, I'm sure somebody will figure out how to fix this. Want to play with Shadow? That might cheer you up. "

I don't play with s-something no more stiff t-than play-doh. Loki tries to scowl through his sobs.

" Ohh, that reminds me. " Al reaches into a couple of his packs and starts to mix some chemicals together. After a few minutes he pours the liquid mixture onto the table all of it forming into sort of marble water beads.

My hair stood up on end. I sensed something horrible entering the tavern. I ducked under the table and hid by Loki's legs.

And I was surprised by how much he did look like me, it was nearly a mirror. Though he was wearing tattered clothing, had clearly defined gender traits, and one eye that shone like rubies. I could never remember whether it was his left eye or his right eye, and seeing it as his right eye now in person had let me become utterly sure about this. He also looked a lot more realistic than when I drew him.

<.< Though since I rely on OotS style for my drawings, I'm not really surprised on that.

Rex entered the Tavern from another universal tour.

Loki looks up at Moxie's masculine double.  He wasn't scared, but he was still upset--and therefore still crying, though he tried to stop that a bit.  He was, after all, king.  And something said that this character might threaten that...

Al looks over at the newcomer as he picks up one of the water-like marbles and tosses it between hands.

Loki should recognize Rex/Regina from all the times they met before.

"Oh, my god! If it isn't the precious king himself!" Rex said, his voice filled with a hellish glee, full of emotion. He took everything to a new level of drama, ever step he took was exaggerated, every word deliberate, too deliberate. He would be a bad actor if I wasn't so sure he made up everything on the spot. "I heard the Town's become childish, but this is kinda ridiculous!" He said, speaking not to Loki, but the entire tavern at once.

He seriously thought he was in a play.

Shut up, Loki says angrily through one of his lessening sobs.

"Oh, of course, by King's decree, of course." Every word was a thrust against Loki, like an aggressive fencer, "I would not dare hurt the little King's feelings."

I knew I should get out of there as quickly as possible.

Al flips one of the water marbles at Rex, which I would like to say now, are poisonous if swallowed. " Don't make fun of the great Calliph Loki. Does that sound right? Should I say Calliph or does it sound better as great Calliph? " He says this last part to child Loki.

Loki stands and the chair beneath him starts to smoke.  You wanna see what this Calliph can do?!  He growls, I don't need to be big to put you in your place. He doesn't seem to hear Al.  His focus is completely on Rex.

Rex deflects the marble off of him. He didn't seem to move. He obviously came prepared for this."Oh, yes, please do, show me." Rex then drew his sword, and had I not known better, I would be laughing, it looks like one of the sticks for a roadside reflector, though in Rex's hands this would be powerful. There was not doubt that he would be immune to fire among other things.

Al makes a small motion to Shadow who steps up behind Rex.

Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't do it. I think repeatedly, but I do not dare speak outloud.

A person is watching in through the window, mostly concealed.  He chuckles.  Things were going according to plan.  He felt almost as skillful as Palpatine in planning.

Loki doesn't seem to take into account that Rex would be immune to fire, as he starts flinging fireballs at Rex.

Rex catches the fireballs in the palm of his hand. "You're making this way too easy. Aren't you the protector of the Town?"

Shadow tries to grab Rex by the throat as he catches the fireball.

No, I'm the boss.  He continues chunking fireballs, bigger and bigger.  Really, a kid can't think of anything better.

Rex is grabbed by the throat. A great grimace grows on his face. This is way too easy for him. I was sitting on the floor, under a table. I could see what was going to happen, but I could not see a way out of this, a way to keep myself alive... because between Rex and Loki in this state, half of the Town may be destroyed.

Rex absorbs each explosion, but I don't know about Shadow.

Technically Shadow is just a physical blob loosely held together usually in the shape of a werewolf. Shadow uses both hands and it starts to get tighter and tighter though not enough to kill. The fireballs hit him but he just seems to ignore it even though its clear his outer layer is getting burned.

Rex takes his sword and then he stabs himself in the chest. Causing him to die.

And by "Die" I mean, "Activate Pinata."
Millions of knives shoot out in all directions where Rex was.

"I know, I have a flare for the dramatic," He pops up on the ceiling above Shadow, spraying a Cone of Cold at it.

Loki gets even more upset as his fireballs do nothing.  Of course, this only makes it harder for him to think of something to hit Rex with.

Finish him off, the watcher mumbles from outside the window, speaking of Rex taking Loki out.  It would be easier to do it himself, of course, but then the Town wouldn't suffer as those that actually were out to help Loki were angered enough to fight back against Rex's unreasonable attack...

As the knives spray out, the person laughs.  This wouldn't kill Loki, but it would hurt.  A lot.

The child screams out in pain as several knives embed themselves in the tiny god.

(I assume the knives sprayed out throughout the tavern.  I may have misinterpreted.)

The knives hit into Shadow while Al ducks behind the bar so not to get hit. With the daggers and cone of cold hitting it Shadow doubles over and curls up on itself. Then Rex will see the daggers starting to protrude from its back before there shot up at him. There's a strange clear liquid that comes from its  wounds before they seal up and its red eyes stare up from once there used to be no eyes.

So Far, Rex had only defended himself, but this was provoked, and I'm fearing my death, so I'm siding against him.

"You're fun." Rex says, Popping to a table to the other side of the bar, "But you are merely getting in my way." Oh, my, reflecting Rex's attack back at him, so predictable. Though with Loki wounded, I know longer feared him blowing up the place again. Rex steps from table to table approaching Loki.

Shadow springs from the ground as a blob trying to engulf Rex even for a second.

Loki attempts to pull the knives out, though it's painstaking and slow.

It hit's Rex's Force field and is deflected. Oh! Yeah, that's how he deflected the water bead without moving! He's gotten scarily powerful. Rex pays the Creature little mind as he steps down and tries to pick Loki up.

Loki is actually too small to fight him off right now.  After all, strength wasn't part of his powers.  Lemme go! Lemme go, Loki screams.

The dark figure smiles evilly.  He loved it when Loki screamed.  That was what he was created for, after all...

The creature reforms into its werewolf shape and lunges at Rex trying to pummel him with its claws and fists.

Rex hold Loki between him and Shadow. Shadow better think twice before it kills the one he's trying to protect. "There is someone here. I want to know where they are."

That doesn't make any sense, Loki cries, attempting to withdraw a knife from himself and stab Rex in an attempt to get him to let Loki go.

Shadow stops its attack and takes a few steps back. Al pops up from behind the bar. " You know it would probably be better if you dealt with me than with a kid. "

Rex gives Loki a swift punch to the face before he could fully pull a knife out of himself. I hope both of those happening at once makes Loki think twice about trying it again. "I don't know the form, or the function. It's different every time. All I know is that they were here. I know that they would have talked to you."

"No, thank you, I'd rather talk to the King." Rex said to Al, his tone jaded and condescending.

I realized who Rex was talking about, and I hoped that no one else told Rex who that person was.

That still doesn't make any sense, Loki yells, before attempting to bite him instead.

"You are the biggest breach to the Fourth Wall here, so I have no doubt that my Player would have spoken to you." Rex says, allowing Loki to bite into his flesh. Rex doesn't mind, nor would he even if Loki managed to draw blood.

I laid in complete silence at Rex's feet, from beneath the table. It occurred to me that Rex couldn't tell me from other characters, and hiding was unnecessary. Well, with the exception of the knives, I bet those stung.

Loki glares up at Rex, biting harder without mumbling a word.

"Come on, little dude, I'm your friend, you can tell o' Uncle Rexy what he's seeking. It won't hurt you to tell me information. However, the alternative." Rex continues ignoring the biting.

Meanwhile I was holding my breath under the table under the fear that Rex could hear my heartbeat.

I could hear my heartbeat.

Loki glares up at him before releasing his bite.  You're not my uncle.  And I'm not telling you anything.  Truth was, it was a bit harder to break the fourth wall in this form.  When he did it for the Star Wars quote the spell hadn't been cast to keep him in this form.

"You are useless." Rex said, as he threw Loki off to the side, Hard. "I take it no one else here will talk." Since everyone else was deadtimed or just plain dead, it was a logical conclusion. Rex started to walk towards the Tavern door.

Loki hits the counter, wincing and gasping in pain as he hears the crack in the wood and feels like there might be something that's cracked in his own body.

Rex walks outside and it'd be a prime time for another evil guy to confront him. When Rex was safely out of the tavern, I jumped up and tried to help Loki out.

Loki winces as he tries to sit up.  Bastard...

I try to see if could use energy to heal his wounds, or if that was blocked off by the shield as well.

Oh, and for ease of conversation, Rex is in the Streets.

(Yeah, sorry, I got distracted shortly after that.)

The healing doesn't seem to be blocked off at all, and Loki sighs gratefully.  Why's he want you?

"Rex believes that since I'm his player, I have power over him. He believes if he kills me, there no one would exist to hold that power over him." I replied, it was ludicrous, Rex has already killed one of my avatars before, Killing this one would be no different.

Huh?  Loki looks as confused as anyone else that didn't know about the fourth wall.  Apparently it was getting worse...

"Something something something... da'kside. Something something something... complete." I replied. "I guess it's complicated."

I...guess it is, Loki looks still very confused.

"All I know is that it's probably not safe for either of us to be spending all of our time inside the Tavern." But there's my wish for adventure.

I decide to curl up to fall asleep there at the base of the bar.

Loki looks down at her worriedly.  Saying it wasn't safe to be here and falling asleep here?  Bad planning.

Well, I hadn't gotten used to the amount of energy one could spend when you heal, so my energy levels were, at the 'I could die right now for some rest.' If Loki or one of the Bartenders decide to move me, it might be alright.

Well, Loki can't move her, so he decides to deadtime beside her to protect her.  He's not a completely bad person, after all.  And that guy obviously wanted her dead.

Pelgof enters, looking tired, his robes a mess, and not having shaved in a while.
You would not believe the things I've gone through in the last three months, he claims to the room in general. After a quick glance to see if he recognises anyone, he pulls up a seat, and slumps down on it, looking exhausted.

I awoke slowly, stiff from sleeping on the floor of the tavern. I was surprised that no one kicked me out.

The young Loki awakes, looking around bleary eyed.  Crying tended to make one that way.  He groans as he realizes he's still a kid.

"It'll be okay," I say, looking at kid Loki, examining him to see if the aura is still present. "I'm sure we can figure out a way to subvert this. We'll need someone powerful enough to break this magic. I don't know if that's powerful."

The magic is still there.

I hope we can find a way to fix it...that way I can show that assh*** who's boss.

"I think seeking out another God would help. This caster was clearly divine, but I couldn't see anyone that could've done this. I fear the trail might be too cold to track." I say, trying to remember the temples of the Town, "Is Inari's still open?"

Pelgof listens into their conversation, for lack of anything else to do. From the sound of it, he probably can't help them, though.

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