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Hawkeye

Trog's Tavern LXXXVII



Upon entering the tavern you find it to be rustic, dim, cramped, and smelling of spilled beer. Moving through the crowd, half of which seem to be deadtiming, you spot a fireplace with a banjowood carving on the mantle, you also make out through the haze the curving bar and private booths hidden behind ferns. A side door leading to a bamboo patio outside reveals a hungry looking dumpster mimic sneaking towards an unsuspecting customer.

On the wall is a large, ornate mirror which people seem to step in and out of freely. A winding staircase near the front door leads to rooms for rent upstairs. In the back room, behind the door with the "Staff Only" sign, there's a dark well leading to mystic and unknown places beneath the tavern.

Trog's Tavern is no longer enchanted to be indestructible. Attempting to damage it will succeed. Now with Free Sweet, Delicious Wi-Fi.

In Memoriam (hall of former staff): Trog (owner emeritus), El Jaspero (manager emeritus), Hoseki (bouncer), Tempest Stormwing (bouncer), Valthreborn Valthera (bouncer), Vivian (bartender), Alex Shipmaster (bartender), Erdan (bartender), Kantur (bartender), Who (cook), Zee (cook)

Current Staff:
Owner and Proprietor: Melantha
Manager: Now hiring
Bartenders: Aurora
Bouncers: Ba'al
Cook: Now hiring
Entertainment: T.B.A.

NOW HIRING: Bartenders, Cooks, Talented bards, Burly bouncers, etc.
(Hey bards: just take spotlight in the tavern's center and start singing!)

Only the finest NPC servers:



Nina - A feisty and vivacious 18 year old (she's legal). Mean and completely unavailable.
Paige - A sweet and wholesome elf working her way through college here in town.
Cosmo - A quick-witted and oppressed gnome scoundrel.

All will be happy to serve you. Since all are NPCs they are up for communal control. Feel free to say what they do or say to you or any other patron. To a point.


GET A FREE DRINK ON YOUR FIRST POST HERE!

THE CURRENT DRINK MENU:
Wines:
Catoblepas Sauvingnon
Chimera Cabernet - A hearty red with a hits of oak and black cherry.
Kobold Chianti - Tart and tangy! Try it with fava beans!
Merfolk Merlot - Full-bodied with a hint of rose.
Purple Worm Pinot - Earthy aroma.
Funky Llama - A rich fruity wine, available in white or red.
Iames Agonia - This tart, dark red wine will stun you and leave you feeling good for hours.
Xorn Zinfandel - Sweet and fruity!
Cormyrian Fireamber - Imported and very good.
Spoonake Chablis - Straight from the Underdark!
Feline's Fancy - A purplish, swirly mixture that any feline will adore.

Mixed Drinks:
Pina CoLlama - If you're not into yoga and have half a brain.
Swampwater - A Phosphorescent lemon-lime delight.
Jasphattan - Sweet vermouth with bitters and more.
White Russian Wukei - Vodka, Kahlua, and Milk.
Long Island Iced Tea - Tastes better than it will make you feel in the morning.
Mai Tai - Dark and pineapple juice.
Sneak on the Beach - Vodka, Cranberry juice, pineapple juice and Peach Schapps.
Rust Monster - Scotch and Drambuie.
Coffee Martini - Buzzzzz.
Murderita - Wasted away again...
Rampaging Rail Mixer - Mad strong!
Ice Liqueur - Guaranteed to cool you down.
Dwarf Spirits
Aboleth Absinthe
LEVEL UP LIQUER - Need a few extra XP? We gots XP in a bottle!
Dragon's Liver Buster - The strongest drink in the house. Don't say we didn't warn you...
Constitution Crushing Wine - Fort. DC 35 or pass out!
Djinn and Tonic - Whirling ice cubes, fizzy soda, and one drunk genie.
Rum Llamonade Daquiri
Mudslide Daquiri
Chuul Lounge - Bacardi Limon, Aberration, creme de bananes and juices
Ichor Liquor - Made from a fermented mix of various kinds of blood
Black Market Wallbanger
Hydrogelic's 110 proof Firewater
Guild Vodka No. 3
Black Shadow - A strong concoction guaranteed to send a chill down your spine at any temperature.
Haley's Liquer - Named for the redheaded rogue, a sweet creme liquer, excellent over ice.
Wizard Blizzard - Crushed ice and Bourbon. The effect depends on the spell stored in it.
Black Ice - Named after one of the greatest rock bands, this mix of Black Shadow and Ice Liquer is guaranteed to give you a chill
Nut Brew - An herbal mixture combined with whiskey. So sweet, it's like your not even drinking!

Beers & Such:
Grim Brewery brand Ginger - Death-o-licious!
Archon Ale
Guilders Ale
Balthor's Best
Mind Flayer Mead - Mmm... brains!

Other Fine Beverages:
Celestial Soda Pop - Soda specially brewed in Celestia. Tastes divine.
Darknight Coffee - Cream has no effect.
SLURPEES!
Root Beer
Red Minotaur - Energy Drink
Llamonade - That cool, refreshing drink for quadrupeds.
Dragon's Fire Breath - Cherry Kool-Aid for the kids!
Fox Cola - The choice of the furry generation.
Hot Chocolate - With little marshmallows and stuff.

MUNCHIES MENU:
Hot Spicy Peanuts - Damned Spicy!
Velvet Elfish - Trogtilla chips with hot cheese and meat dip - soooo good.
Fortune Cookies - I got this deal with a local factory see...
Bamhacon - Where ham meets bacon.
Gyros
Salads - Spring Greens, Caesar, and Italian Pasta
Who's Surprise
Muffins
Brownies

SMOKABLES:
Dwarven Cigars - From our axe-hewn humidor
Coffin Nail™ Cigarettes - Get Nailed!
Halfling Pipeweed - Bogart™ brand


If you don't see it, ask for it!
Gnrlshrimp

"Ah, just mix together the five most flammable drinks in a pint glass. That should hit the spot." Ba'al puts the mic down for now. He might do another song later, but drinking a near-lethal drink is of slightly higher importance right now.
Hawkeye

"I think they're all highly flammable, but I think the five strongest would do the trick. Most alcohol content." she mixes up a DLB and a CC to start with, and then picks out three others at random. She hands the combined mixture over to Ba'al.
Gnrlshrimp

"And the crazy destruction god said "let there be fire!" and behold!" The drink bursts into flames with a loud whumph noise and Ba'al quickly glugs down the flaming mixture. "What are you doing behind the bar anyway, killer queen?" That's Melantha's nickname for life now by the way.
Hawkeye

And not one she's going to argue with  Very Happy

She grins "Well seeing that the new 'owner' of the tavern has done a bunk I thought that I'd give running this place a shot."
Gnrlshrimp

"What's that, the second hostile take-over in a week? Well, unless you give me a raise I'm afraid I'll have to side with the previous owner if he shows up again, Queen." Shouldn't be that big an issue really, Ba'al only ever spends his money on booze anyway. He returns the now-empty glass and sits down on a stool at the bar. "And even if you are incredibly attractive, as a bouncer I would still have to throw you out from behind the bar."
Hawkeye

"Well I promise to be a lot more proactive in this tavern than the last owner, and the owner before that for the most of his tenure. Come on, I like this place and I'm willing to put in the effort to try to get it moving again. And your position as bouncer is secure." she smiles slightly "Or, if you're willing of course, I'll put up an advert for a bouncer position, last man standing. So you get to beat up whoever applies."
Gnrlshrimp

"Aww, you'd do that for me? How sweet! It's alright though, I'm not in the mood for beating up a load of mindless idiots at the moment. What kind of improvements are you going to make to this place though?" It is a pretty nice place after all. Trog's has always been popular and there's never been much in the way of change...

"Getting rid of the quiet monster would be nice. Oh, shit..." Here come the tentacles...

Except Ba'al just explodes them all with a click of his fingers. "Well that was boring. Still it'd be nice if someone got rid of it. I would but I haven't a clue if the damn thing wouldn't take the tavern with it, or something. Generally I just explode things, I don't normally have to worry about side-effects."
Hawkeye

Melantha sighs "The Q-monsters origins are sadly lost to the ages when the Great Purge happened. Well, it's past bed time for my player with work in the morning, so I'll just sit here and make notes, you know, look like someone's in charge and all." she grins and turns her attention to rather scribbled pieces of paper behind the bar.
apeoflight

Al walks in naturally not provoking anybody or anything.
Hawkeye

Melantha looks around from behind the bar and then begins drawing before any customers come in.
Gnrlshrimp

Ba'al glares at Al from his seat at the bar. "So help me, if you're here to cause any more trouble I'm going to tear you limb from limb! And I bet that bloody chameleon thing was your doing too!"
apeoflight

Al shrugs. " Chameleon? I don't know what your talking about. " He says with a grin and a too innocent voice.
Morty

Dipsnig comes back downstairs.
apeoflight

Al looks over at Dipsnig and smirks to himself.
Morty

Dipsnig sits down in the corner and orders some drink.
apeoflight

" Well I think I'll leave now before this place is swarmed.  " Al says and quickly leaves.
Morty

Dipsnig examines the Taverna, wondering what on earth did this guy mean since those place is amost empty.
apeoflight

Dipsing might hear the flapping of large wings over the tavern or perhaps the snarl of a wolf and the hissing of snakes. Perhaps he even hears the snarling and growl of a large bear.
Morty

Dipsnig listens closely, readying himself to make a run for it if he has to.
apeoflight

Something starts to claw at the of the roof tearing shingles away. Then what seems like a large bear bursts through the door breaking it and the surrounding wall. The bear has no fur though. Instead it seems to have the tough hide of an elephant along with large tusks protruding out of it's mouth.
Morty

Dipsnig gets under the table.
apeoflight

There's a large caw that comes from up above on top of the tavern before more scratching and tearing is heard. The bear sniffs the air and gets down on all fours and starts to walk around knocking tables and chairs over while sniffing and searching.
Morty

Dipsnig tries to scurry off so that he's separated from the bear by at least several tables.
apeoflight

The monstrosity turns its head at the movement and growls moving towards the sound and smell that is Dipsnig.
Morty

Dipsnig unslungs his crossbow, loads it and shoots the creature, aiming for its eye.
apeoflight

The creature turns slightly at the sound of the crossbow being loaded and is hit near its shoulder instead. It growls and stands clearly enraged by this.
Hawkeye

Melantha points at the bear "Oy! Get your filthy ass out of my tavern!"
Morty

Dipsnig tries to reaload the crossbow and shoot again before the bear charges him. Kind of hard to do this when his hands are shaking, though.
apeoflight

The bear turns to Melantha and roars dropping to all fours before charging at her knocking tables and chairs away.
Hawkeye

Melantha makes some gestures in the air and a wall of what appears to be made of shadow forms between her and the bear. A large grey wolf appears by her side and growls.
apeoflight

The bear runs into the wall of shadow digging its tusks into it and trying to tear at it. Again tearing at the top and what sounds like the roof collapsing along with another large squawk.
Morty

Dipsnig, who was aiming at the bear's back, aims at the roof, ready to shoot whatever comes inside next.
Hawkeye

As the bear tears into the wall it manages to get through the wall slightly, but inside the wall it's much more than icy cold. Cold enough to do serious damage to the bear.

Melantha looks upwards and tries to see what's causing the damage.
apeoflight

Whatever is up there starts to claw at the second floor. The tavern goers might hear hissing from snakes and a low growl from a wolf outside.

The bear growls and steps back before trying to charge through the wall of shadow.
Hawkeye

Melantha casts a spell creating a flood of shadows to appear in the area. If the bear tries to come through the wall it's got to be prepared to take a hell of a lot of cold damage.
Morty

Dipsnig fires a crossbow bolt at the bear and immediately begins reloading his crossbow.
apeoflight

As the bear starts to go through it stops growling in pain and quickly backing up outside the shadows. It roars and stands up on all fours and starts to claw away at the shadows. And the bear is then hit in the back by the bolt making it roar in pain again and turning towards Dipsing.
Hawkeye

More cold damage for the bear.

Melantha fades from sight and travels through the shadows to the other side of the wall, but quite a far way away from the bear.
Morty

Dipsnig runs away from the bear, hiding under another table.
apeoflight

Finally a giant hawk breaks through the second floor into the first just about the entire roof and second floor broken away. The bear charges towards Dipsing once again.
Morty

And Dipsnig tosses a tanglefoot bag at its legs.
apeoflight

The bear's front legs get all tangled causing it to almost flip and then land on its side. Annoyed with the gooky green stuff the bear immediately starts to try and tear and bite away at it.
Hawkeye

"Oh to hell with it! Maximised Shadow Storm!" a rift to the shadow plane opens and torrents of cold and electricity come out and strike at the bear, and once doing that it rebounds to the hawk.

((in d&d terms, 180 damage half cold/half electric to the bear, and then half of that to the hawk like chain lightning))
apeoflight

The bear roars in pain and thrashes about and then stops. The hawk is also hit and then tries to fly away but only makes it to about the second floor before dropping dead itself. Yet from outside there is the howl of a wolf not to far away.
Morty

Dipsnig turns to the door, crossbow loaded.
Hawkeye

Melantha smiles "Mmmm, that felt good." she walks behind the bar and presses the fix-it button.
apeoflight

The tavern repairs itself but the dead do not go away. Dipsing will see a wolf at the door but it stops seeing Dipsing. It lets out a growl and backs away out of sight.
Hawkeye

Melantha looks up and towards Dipsing "Do you see something out there?"
Morty

Dipsnig stays there with the crossbow loaded and aimed at the door for a while, in case anything else decides to drop by.
A wolf, but it seems to be gone now.
Hawkeye

Melantha frowns, and then looks down for a second "Tala, go and look." the gray wolf looks at Melantha before trotting towards the door.
apeoflight

The wolf won't see anything but if might smell that a wolf was there and... also maybe some snakes.
Hawkeye

The wolf stays around where she smells the other wolf was in case it came back.
Morty

Dipsnig relaxes, unloads his crossbow and slungs it across his back again.
Hawkeye

"Nobody invades my tavern while I'm in charge." she looks towards Dipsing "Are you hurt?"
apeoflight

From the back at the kitchen there comes a hissing sound low and quiet.
Morty

I'm fi- what's what noise in the kitchen? Dipsnig's ears perk up.
Hawkeye

Melantha tilts her head "Tala says it's likely either that wolf or some snakes."
apeoflight

There's some more hissing this time closer.
Morty

Dipsnig loads his crossbow again.
Sounds like snakes to me.
Hawkeye

Melantha dismisses the wall of shadows and picks up a light crossbow from behind the bar "Looks like we're going to have some company again soon."
apeoflight

A very large snake pokes its head around the corner of the door to the kitchen and looks around.
Morty

It's greeted by a crossbow bolt from Dipsnig.
Hawkeye

And another bolt from Melantha.
apeoflight

Both miss and the snake hisses at them and withdraws for now back into the kitchen.
Morty

Dipsnig reloads his crossbow.
There's probably a lot of them there.
Hawkeye

She nods "I think you're right, but I've got plenty more magic left in me."
Gnrlshrimp

"Oh for crying out loud! Why does this stuff always happen while I'm in deadtime?" Ba'al slams his fist into a table, smashing it to pieces. "Sorry about that. Right now I've got some snakes to kill." Time for the bouncer to do his work...

Not looking at all worried, only angry, Ba'al draws his blood red sword out of the air and walks towards the kitchen. "You coming, Melantha? It might be fun slaughtering snakes." Dipsnig is ignored, Ba'al has already categorised him as a coward.
apeoflight

Another snake slithers out slightly and then withdraws again seeing both of them ready with crossbows.
Hawkeye

Melantha looks at Ba'al "Hey, what happened to my nickname?" she casts some buff spells on herself and walks towards the kitchens (but behind Ba'al, that's what meat shields are there for)
Obscurejones

Al notices the commotion and floats silently back towards the kitchen following Ba'al and Melantha.
Gnrlshrimp

"Nicknames when we're not being attacked," Ba'al replies with a rather harsh tone in his voice. He's angry now, which is why he already has several of those horribly destructive black orbs of his orbiting around him when he kicks down the kitchen door in case there's a snake behind it.

Melantha is going to want to stay well clear of those orbs.
Morty

Dipsnig follows Ba'al and Melantha into the kitchen.
apeoflight

It seems some one has turned off the lights here in the kitchen. It's pretty dark in there and the'll hear a couple of snakes hiss.
Obscurejones

Al calls up a small fire to light the kitchen.
Morty

As a goblin, Dipsnig has perfect night vision. He observes the kitchen carefully.
apeoflight

As the light appears they see a couple of snakes slither away from it behind one of the counters.
Morty

Dipsnig attempts to shoot one of the snakes before it disappears.
Gnrlshrimp

Small fire is small.

Ba'al clicks his fingers and suddenly the whole room is on fire. Well, actually, all the kitchen-y stuff is fine, but anything unkitchen-y such as giant snakes are going to find themselves engulfed in flames.

Good thing Ba'al is at the front, isn't it? He's angry enough now that he'd probably do that if someone was in the room ahead of him.
apeoflight

It barely misses the slithery thing as it disappears behind the counter. And then the snakes catch fire. Nine snakes behind the counter rear up and wither in pain, or so it seems.
Hawkeye

Melantha watches the flames, with a spell ready for any snakes that creep out the inferno alive.
Obscurejones

Al raises an eyebrow at Ba'al.
Overcompensating for something?
Morty

Dipsnig reloads his crossbow and waits.
Gnrlshrimp

"Any more comments like that from you and you'll be burning in there with them."
apeoflight

The writhe in pain for a second more before stopping. They then hiss in what sounds like a chuckle before striking at Ba'al each in turn. Somewhere between 1-3 bites isn't deadly, 4-7 can be potentially lethal, 8 usually is and 9 is a sure thing most of the time.
Obscurejones

Al nods.
Got it.  No pointing out when a god is flailing about unable to kill a garden snake.
Hawkeye

When they advance, Melantha steps to one side of Ba'al and sends out tendrils of punishing shadows at the snakes before stepping back behind the god.
Gnrlshrimp

Hey, guess what?

Ba'al explodes and disappears, leaving the snakes facing a barrage of orbs of destruction.

Meanwhile, Ba'al reappears behind Al with his sword pointing at his back. "Not now. Really not a good idea to make comments like that at the moment."
Obscurejones

Al glances over Melanthas tendrils.
Evard's tentacles of spiked intrusion?
Morty

Dipsnig shoots at the snakes again, hoping that now that they're close together, the bolt will hit at least one of them.
apeoflight

Okay, in order now. The tendrils scratch the sides of the snakes and the orbs miss while the bolts grazes one of the snakes. The snakes draw back and hiss at the company.
Obscurejones

Al steps around Ba'al's sword and moves out of the kitchen.
See you later macho.  I need a drink and we're crowded back here.
Hawkeye

Melantha frowns, another flood of shadow is cast over the kitchen and she then casts a now empowered shadow fireball at the snakes.
Morty

Dipsnig tosses a flask of acid at the snakes, grimacing. This stuff costs quite a bit.
Gnrlshrimp

Ba'al sighs, petty revenge could wait for later. He runs back in front of Melantha and waits for the snakes to gather enough bravery to strike...

And as soon as they do those orbs of destruction will strike from behind them.
apeoflight

The shadow attacks catch a few of the snakes and the drop. The acid catches one and it also falls down presumably dead. Only 5 remain after that and they strike out at Ba'al. 4 of them are hit and the one remaining one withdraws. It might be noted that it seems the snakes never show there tails and ends. It seems they always are hiding that part behind the counter.
Gnrlshrimp

There's an advantage to being a god. Said advantage being that Ba'al is bloody hard to kill...but he doesn't really want to be covered in snake bites anyway so he blocks one snake with his sword, ducks under the next two, backflips away from the one after that...

And then gets bitten on the leg. "Lucky bastard!"
Hawkeye

MElantha frowns and casts a spell which lets her see things from another position. That position is around the counter so she can see all of the snakes.
Morty

Dipsnig tosses another tanglefoot bag at the snakes, hoping that the sticky goo will slow them down.
apeoflight

The last snake takes the bag to the body not really seeming to do anything. Melantha sees that the snakes aren't actually snakes... sort of. Its seems that the nine snakes are connected to a wolf where the tail should be.

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