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True Facts about Chuck Norris: Volume One

 
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Renom
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Joined: 28 Jan 2008
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Location: Somewhere between insanity and logical resoning.

PostPosted: Sun Sep 21, 2008 9:09 pm    Post subject: True Facts about Chuck Norris: Volume One  Reply with quote

Here we shall place all information reguarding Chuck Norris.

(For amusement purposes only)

1. When Chuck Norris jumps into water, he does not get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris.


Last edited by Renom on Mon Sep 22, 2008 6:09 am; edited 1 time in total
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apeoflight



Joined: 21 Aug 2008
Posts: 10440


Location: A void where time doesn't seem to matter

PostPosted: Sun Sep 21, 2008 10:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

2. When Chuck Norris does push ups, he pushes the world down not himself up.
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McBish
Titleless in the Town


Joined: 04 Jun 2007
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Location: WI

PostPosted: Sun Sep 21, 2008 10:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

3. Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer.  Too bad he never cries.

4. Chuck Norris doesn't get stuck in traffic, traffic gets stuck in him.
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Renom
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Joined: 28 Jan 2008
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Location: Somewhere between insanity and logical resoning.

PostPosted: Mon Sep 22, 2008 6:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

5. A cobra once bit Chuck Norris. After three painful days, the cobra died.
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Xaspian
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Joined: 08 Jun 2007
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 22, 2008 7:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

A variation of 2 - That's not Chuck Norris doing push-ups, that's Chuck Norris saving the world from passing asteroids/meteorites (I always get them confused).
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Orange Zergling
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Joined: 02 Jun 2007
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Location: in ur bse, kilin ur doodz

PostPosted: Mon Sep 22, 2008 3:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

6. Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
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Renom
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Joined: 28 Jan 2008
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Location: Somewhere between insanity and logical resoning.

PostPosted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 1:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

7: The president once took a bullet for Chuck Norris. Not as if a bullet could pierce Chuck's skin, but it's the thought that counts.
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Last edited by Renom on Tue May 12, 2009 8:09 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Uberblah
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Joined: 02 Jun 2007
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 2:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Similar to 6: Chuck Norris CAN talk about Fight Club.
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Moxie
Genderbender Extraordinaire


Joined: 12 Jan 2008
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PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2009 8:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris can still suck at roles that even Steven Seagal would've turned down?
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TwoBitWriter



Joined: 14 Dec 2008
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Location: Norman, OK

PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2009 2:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chuck Norris put the lime in the coconut, then roundhouse kicked the doctor who recommended it.
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Renom
Hard to Please


Joined: 28 Jan 2008
Posts: 1456


Location: Somewhere between insanity and logical resoning.

PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2009 8:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

8: Bill Gates lives in constant fear of Cuck Norris's PC crashing.

9: Cuck Norris's round house kicks leave rainbows behind.


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